How to Turn a Girl On - The 8 Best Ways, From a Woman
"Looking to ignite that spark with the woman you're dating? 🌶️
I'm Blaine, the top dating coach for men, and today...
We'll explore the 8 best methods to get her excited!
Just a heads up, each suggestion involves varying degrees of intimacy.
Concerned your crush might not be into something? → Skip it!
TABLE OF CONTENTS
1. Maintain eye contact
2. Lightly tease her
3. Build tension
4. Share a desire
5. Make physical contact
6. Kiss her passionately
7. Offer her a massage
8. Snuggle with her
1. Maintain eye contact
A woman with brown hair glances back and smiles at a man, who is partially hidden in the foreground.
This might seem straightforward, but many guys miss the mark...
Intense eye contact is alluring.
Gaze into her eyes and hold that connection for a few seconds longer than usual 👀⏳
She'll likely smile, possibly look away, or ask "What?!"
This is your chance to give her a sincere compliment, such as:
🗣️ You’re absolutely gorgeous...
🗣️ I really think you’re beautiful...
🗣️ You look incredibly sexy right now...
Then just watch as she lights up!
Small, intimate exchanges like this get her excited, and it's your role as a man to cultivate them.
2. Lightly tease her
A man and a woman sitting at a table in a bright cafe, sharing laughter over a joke.
Sassy teasing can be a significant turn-on for women.
Unsure how to playfully tease her?
Try this simple line:
🗣️ You're such trouble.
You don’t need to add anything else!
Just throw this out there with a charming smile and let it linger—it's bound to turn her on.
Want to try something a bit riskier?
Tease her about her outfit’s allure. For instance:
🗣️ That little black dress is seriously seductive...
She may ask what you think or even question if her outfit is too much...
In response, give her a heartfelt compliment like:
🗣️ I can’t take my eyes off it; I want it all for myself...
Check my article on How To Tease A Girl - Flirty Text Examples for more playful ideas!
3. Build tension
A couple clinking glasses of wine, with one gazing into the camera while the other whispers something in her ear.
Tension is enticing, as it fosters anticipation and demands self-control.
If you're aiming to excite a girl, consider stirring up tension with a line like:
🗣️ You’re not ready for what I have planned for you later...
🗣️ You can't fathom what I’m going to do to you later...
These phrases carry strong sexual undertones, so only use them if you believe she's comfortable with that level of intimacy!
However, there are plenty of less suggestive ways to build tension.
The objective is to pique curiosity, excitement, and temptation.
For example, plan a romantic surprise date and *hint* there’s something special waiting for her via text without revealing too much:
📲💬 Meet me at 6 pm at my place tomorrow. Dress nicely, and get ready for a fun evening ;)
She might probe for more info. Keep the suspense alive by making her wait:
📲💬 You’ll have to wait and see ;)
Well-planned surprises can be incredibly alluring, so give this a shot!
4. Share a desire
A couple on a rooftop deck, beers in hand, as the woman whispers into the man's ear.
We just discussed how to turn women on by making them curious about what’s to come without outlining everything explicitly...
You can also amp up the excitement by doing the opposite!
Describing your desires in vivid detail can be a major turn-on.
To maintain a PG vibe, here are some ideas for you to finish:
🗣️ As soon as I get you home, I want to...
🗣️ I can already picture how I’m going to get you out of that outfit, and...
🗣️ I thought it was so exciting when you got on top of me on the couch, and...
These examples are certainly charged.
Be mindful of whether it’s fitting to share them!
If the fantasies you’re expressing have already occurred with her, you're likely in safe territory, and sharing those dreams can definitely heat things up 🥰
5. Make physical contact
A woman glances back at a man, as he reaches out to touch her shoulder.
Touch is beneficial for our emotional and physical well-being. If you're curious, I recommend checking out this insightful overview by Berkeley Psychology professor Dacher Keltner.
Furthermore, touch can be a major turn-on!
If you're comfortable starting to connect through touch, consider:
👉 Wrapping your arms around her lower back, pulling her closer
👉 Resting your hand on her thigh when seated next to one another
👉 Lightly stroking her hand, moving your finger gently back and forth
Any of these actions, especially when combined with a soft touch, can create a thrilling experience.
Not so experienced with touch?
If you’re worried it may come off as inappropriate or creepy, try a couple of things:
Test the waters by casually touching her hand, arm, or elbow—all non-invasive spots typically considered safe on a first date. Pay attention to her response to gauge her comfort level.
When uncertain, just ask. Getting consent is smart, not strange. Try simply saying, “Can I put my arm around you?”
By the way, if you’re looking to excel in nonverbal communication and continually develop romantic chemistry with women you like...
Check out my Dating Masterclass—if spots are available, it could be the perfect opportunity for you.
6. Kiss her
A couple standing on the beach at sunset, as the man leans in for a kiss.
You've heard it before, and it’s accurate:
🎼 One kiss is all it takes...
Kissing can excite the woman you’re dating!
It’s romantic and serves as the gateway to more intimate activities 😉
Of course, a fantastic kiss can stand on its own as a cherished moment.
Many women reminisce about their favorite kisses just as deeply as any other memorable romantic experience.
Yet, if your aim is more toward 👉👌 than 💏...
Take your time with the kiss.
Last year, I surveyed over 1,000 American women between 21 and 35 to understand their desires in the bedroom.
Many responses simply asked for "more kissing," while countless other mentions of "extended foreplay" hinted at the importance of kissing.
In short, kissing is a potent turn-on for women.
Don't overthink it (e.g., whether to use tongue or not)
Just trust your instincts, pay attention to her responses, and let it be enjoyable!
7. Offer her a massage
A man smiles as he massages a woman's shoulders, who is also smiling in delight.
One of the most effective methods to excite a girl is through a calming massage.
I'm not an expert on massage techniques (remember, I'm a dating coach!), but thankfully, it's not terribly complex 💆♀️.
To turn her on with a massage, try this:
Position yourself behind her, ideally a bit elevated (like you on the couch while she’s on the floor) to be at head level
Gently knead her shoulders, upper back, and neck using your thumbs
Run your fingers through her hair (many people love a good scalp massage)
Pay attention to her feedback about the pressure and movements she enjoys
Foot massages can also be a huge hit! Ask her what she prefers, and just go for it.
8. Snuggle with her
A woman is gleefully perched on a man's lap on a couch, playfully touching his face.
Cuddling might come off as innocent, but...
Great cuddles can ignite desire in women too!
Not sure where to start?
If you're on a couch together, wrap your arm around her, allowing her to lean in close.
You could also invite her to sit on your lap!
Alternatively, ask if she’d like to spoon, as if you were in bed. If she agrees, lie down behind her, making sure your bodies are snug.
If you’re already in bed with a woman you’re romantically involved with, try wrapping your arms around her and cuddling from behind.
Want to elevate the moment even further?
Introduce gentle movements between your
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